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WHAT STATE ARE YOUR UNDERCRACKERS IN?

Updated: May 10, 2021

UNDER CRACKERS

What is the current situation with your under cracker drawer? Are they all Agent Provocateur peepholes or do you have the over-the-shoulder-bolder-holders your Nan used to favour; the sort that could fit a large adults head in, or possibly double as a slingshot for marauding Vikings?


It’s an often overlooked part of dressing but if your bits and bobs aren’t tucked in to something that makes you feel comfortable and dare I say sexy (within reason lets be honest!!!) then the clothes that go over them will stand little chance of hanging right and making you feel great.


You want a bra that gives you a shape you like.If its push up, good for you! If it’s sans-padding, just as great! As long as it fulfills the basic requirement of making you feel and look GREAT!!!


Got it?


MEASURE MEASURE MEASURE

Say it with me, like Dora, measure measure measure! If you haven’t been measured in the last year and your shape might have changed, go soon. If you haven’t been to get measured since your boobs actually sat above your waistband then you’re in bigger trouble than I thought…


If you can get more than a fist between your back and your bra strap your either a) a contortionist b) your bra elastic has gone, or even worse c) it was too loose in the first place! Get measured now!


Marks & Spencer’s and John Lewis are the gold standard of bra fitting services and generally will require an appointment although if your lucky one of the team will be free when you rock up and will help.


This also goes if your post op. After kicking horrible old breast cancers ass, when the time comes that you feel ready to get something new. Do not be shy of the ‘fitting ladies’ they are lovely, empathetic and they know their shiz. This is absolutely the time to invest in something that makes you feel pretty around the boobage. My dear friend who I went with recently felt amazing again after purchasing a couple of well fitted bras with matching knickknacks.


Don’t over look your local lingerie shop, if you are lucky enough to live near a high street that still has more than a £1 shop (don’t buy bras in there FFS), then support your small independents. They are delighted to help, can offer a range of sizes from small to industrial and can order items in if they don’t have them in stock. Check out Silks on Hyndland Roadif you live locally to Glasgow.


Personally I prefer a bralet to a structured bra, I’m not one for underwire although I was in the past but now I find it so uncomfortable. I have discovered Marks & Spencer’s braletsrecently, pretty as well as comfortable and great for sizes ranging from my ironing board bust up to people who actually have boobs.





BRA CARE

Bras should be hand washed and not too often or they will just die a death, i.e. you will kill the elastic. Use the hand wash setting on your machine or do it by your actual hand if you have the time. Stack bras with formed cups in a flat lay if you can. Don’t crush them into drawers. All this will lengthen the life of the cup and elastic so if you are in the situation where you have to pay a small fortune for specialist scaffolding at least the bras will last that little bit longer.

An industry rule of thumb is you should replace your bra every 6 months, I don’t think this is realistic and it depends heavily on how often the bra is worn and washed but if you take care of them they will definitely last considerably longer. I absolutely have bras that are older than this. But I don’t wash those ones. Nice.


EDIT YOUR MANKY DRAWERS

Turning to the under crackers, if your hanging on to drawers that have seen better days then I’d suggest you got rid. You know, the grey rank pants that you keep for those special days of the month that you only want to mentally torture yourself and lie on the sofa eating family sized Galaxy’s and watching the soothing sound of George Clark?


My suggestion is even your ‘period knickers’ can be decent! Again good old M&S have a range of cool ladies boxer style shorts. Have something to cover your bum that is comfortable and does not give you a front or back wedgie – OUCH!


Dare I say it grab some pink leopard print knickers; make yourself smile when you look in the mirror! It makes a HUGE difference to your confidence. They don’t have to be coordinated with your bra – who has time for all that nonsense – but it does help if they are at least nice and you like them!


I’ve linked what I mentioned above and that is all for this week… who knows what searing topic I will cover next week?! Welcome to suggestons!

Ex

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Always depend on M&S for my undies and the bra fitting ladies are brilliant. Really know what they're talking about and run the legs off themselves to find you the right fit and style!

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